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The perfect song for the 12th Annual Solstice Story.

 Pablo Cruise Find Your Place in the Sun



Winter Solstice  2017, Dec 21st, 10:27AM

 Sunrise:  7:48am  Sunset  4:34pm
Yuck, 8 cold, freaking hours and 46 stinking minutes!

Compared to:

Summer solstice sunrise: 5:26am Sunset:  9:03pm
Hot damn, 15 hrs and 37 min’s of glorious sunshine!

You know what? I’m tired of fighting this battle every year. I’m sick of rejoicing in the long, languid days of summer and then plunging into a pit of despair during the interminable, numbing short days of December. You might say that I’m sort of like a dull male dog (is “dull male” an oxymoron?) heading to the veterinarian of seasons: life is great; see the nice doctor lady, wagging tail, get a doggy treat . . . and then, well, you know, suddenly you’re wearing the head cone of winter shame. Ugh. 

So, just move to FL full time, you might say, and quit complaining about winter, you whiner!  Ah, but grasshopper, you misunderstand me. I don’t want to die of heat prostration in the summer and freeze my ass off in the winter. Also, I don’t want to pack up the dog and Mrs Dear Leader and drive  back and forth across the country like a Sun-possessed Tom Joad. No sir, in my dotage I want some kind of consistency. I want dependable days and nights, somewhere that the solstice is a non-factor!

You say, “Dear Leader, that’s just crazy talk, there has to be a solstice.” I know, I know, the sun revolves around the earth, the days get longer and then they get shorter – blah, blah, blah. (What, you thought the earth rotated around Sun? Ha! that Copernicus guy was just an early elitist, a so-called “expert” - fake news! - trust me on this.)  Anyway, I’ve got  the real news for you.

Look at this:

Summer solstice Sunrise:  6:12  Sunset:   6:19
Vernal Equinox:                6:17  Sunset:   6:24
Autumnal Equinox:           6:03  Sunset:   6:10
Winter Solstice    Sunrise: 6:08   Sunset:  6:16

Just about 12 hours of splendid sunshine ALL THE FREAKING TIME!

And all you gotta do is  . . . move to Quito, Ecuador! (Well, you could always move to Nairobi, Singapore or Kuala Lumpur too, I guess, but I’ve been to Quito and it’s only one time zone a way.)  Then there’s this: Retire to Quito, Most Beautiful City in So America. Even better, a martini is only like a buck and a half!

So there you have it, problem solved.
Okay, there is one little detail – telling Mrs Dear Leader about my plan. But I’m sure you’ll agree that she will think it’s a great idea too!

 Be sure you check out this song as well - not only is it still a great tune but you get to see what 40 some years does to a guy. In my case, I can just look in a mirror (and thankfully I haven’t aged at all.) 



PS
In next year’s epistle plan on hearing me complaining about being bored because every day is the same. . .




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